Oh, what to say about this one? While the original was no masterpiece or summer blockbuster, one still has to question the wisdom of a bunch of amateurs re-making it on a budget of 27p; watching it though, that appears to be what has happened.
From the opening scene of the worlds most amateurish detectives, to a thunderstorm clearly filmed inside and achieved by going nuts with a dimmer switch. From an obviously pre-broken mast falling apart at its break line, to the some if the worst acting an SFX I've ever seen; for the first half hour I really thought this one was going to fall into the "so bad it's good" camp.
As with the original, a couple are introduced early in the film, simply to be dispatched; although this time around, a beach scene is replaced by a really bad soft-porn interlude in a tent.
The movie is german, with a german cast; so i was slightly puzzled as to why the aforementioned copulating couple were speaking English (with thick German accents). I can only assume they were playing English or American tourists? Either way it added to the batshit insanity, and I was at this point loving it.
We meet another Pair of campers, who, in the miday sun, declare themselves so lost that they may as well stop looking for the campsite and spend the night where they are (so lost, thy one of them decides to nip off down the pub).
Yes for the first half hour it is brilliantly bad.
Sadly, it isn't long before the rot sets in and it becomes jut another bad film, and incompetent remake of a movie that was never great to begin with.
Characters act in seemingly random ways ("where is the car", "I don't know <points>", "lets go" <walks in direction of pointing, finds car>), even the set decoration makes no sense ("Go away" is written on the INSIDE of a window).
Lodge full of corpses? Best stay inside feeling sick until someone else comes in and suggests you leave!
Been shot 6 times AND disembowelled yourself? That's no reason not to chase someone around the woods!
If it's ever classified (unlikely, given that the classification process costs more than i imagine the film itself did) then catch the first half hour when it finally makes it to the Horror Channel and laugh at it; Otherwise, Avoid.
Showing posts with label Anthropophagous 2000. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Anthropophagous 2000. Show all posts
Monday, 5 August 2013
Saturday, 3 August 2013
Anthropophagous 2000 - Lisa's Review
*** SPOILERS *** (for what it's worth)
There are sometimes weeks when the movie isn't that hot, sometimes it's awful and sometimes we are very tempted to write "This was absolute shite" and leave it at that. Sadly, for me, this was the latter.
This movie is a remake of 1980 movie of the same name (removing the 2000). While the original movie wasn't all that hot, this one is just absolute bollocks! I suppose I should elaborate as to why I felt this was the case?
I'm not going to go into detail as to the premise, as I very much doubt anyone will want to see this movie on the strength of my review. Man kills his wife when she refuses to let him eat their dead child to survive after an accident at sea. He eats them both and then goes mad and kills and eats other people. That should about sum it up for you. Why didn't I enjoy it?
The acting was probably amongst the worst I have seen. The gore looked like something a GSCE art student produced (that's probably an insult to GCSE art students). Victims are replaced with what looks like a rubber model of themselves (that bears absolutely no resemblance to them) and then over the top, unrealistic, ridiculous gore is spattered upon us.
In one specific scene I struggled to understand what actual body part is being tugged out of one victims mouth... it looked like intestines (much too long for the tongue), but since the killer put his hand to the back of the victims throat and pulled, it's anyones guess.
Arms and heads are forcibly pulled off simply by the sheer strength of our bad guy. Various bits which should be anatomically there are not and vice versa. Victims flail about and make no attempt whatsoever to run. A pregnant woman flounders on her back and allows her stomach to be cut open and her unborn baby to be lifted out and bitten into, with nothing more than a few squeals.
The bad guy himself tugs out his own innards and chews on them after being shot multiple times and STILL has the strength to give chase to the last survivor and try to kill him!
If the gore scenes are laughable, then you have to see the sex scenes. I have never seen such passionless love making in all my life. The actors looked positively bored shitless! On one positive point, nice to see tattoos, piercings and long haired dudes in movies.
I don't think there is much else I can say about this movie. I HATED it. I didn't even laugh at the ridiculousness of it all. I didn't have to think twice about slapping a big fat AVOID on its ass!
There are sometimes weeks when the movie isn't that hot, sometimes it's awful and sometimes we are very tempted to write "This was absolute shite" and leave it at that. Sadly, for me, this was the latter.
This movie is a remake of 1980 movie of the same name (removing the 2000). While the original movie wasn't all that hot, this one is just absolute bollocks! I suppose I should elaborate as to why I felt this was the case?
I'm not going to go into detail as to the premise, as I very much doubt anyone will want to see this movie on the strength of my review. Man kills his wife when she refuses to let him eat their dead child to survive after an accident at sea. He eats them both and then goes mad and kills and eats other people. That should about sum it up for you. Why didn't I enjoy it?
The acting was probably amongst the worst I have seen. The gore looked like something a GSCE art student produced (that's probably an insult to GCSE art students). Victims are replaced with what looks like a rubber model of themselves (that bears absolutely no resemblance to them) and then over the top, unrealistic, ridiculous gore is spattered upon us.
In one specific scene I struggled to understand what actual body part is being tugged out of one victims mouth... it looked like intestines (much too long for the tongue), but since the killer put his hand to the back of the victims throat and pulled, it's anyones guess.
Arms and heads are forcibly pulled off simply by the sheer strength of our bad guy. Various bits which should be anatomically there are not and vice versa. Victims flail about and make no attempt whatsoever to run. A pregnant woman flounders on her back and allows her stomach to be cut open and her unborn baby to be lifted out and bitten into, with nothing more than a few squeals.
The bad guy himself tugs out his own innards and chews on them after being shot multiple times and STILL has the strength to give chase to the last survivor and try to kill him!
If the gore scenes are laughable, then you have to see the sex scenes. I have never seen such passionless love making in all my life. The actors looked positively bored shitless! On one positive point, nice to see tattoos, piercings and long haired dudes in movies.
I don't think there is much else I can say about this movie. I HATED it. I didn't even laugh at the ridiculousness of it all. I didn't have to think twice about slapping a big fat AVOID on its ass!
Monday, 29 July 2013
Week 115: Anthropophagous 2000
Year: 1999
Reviews / Author Comments due: 3/8/13
Reason for Inclusion: Remake of DDP nasty, Anthropophagous
BBFC Status: Never passed, therefore nominally banned.
DVD: Euro Import
No Trailer
Feel free to use the comments section of this post to add your own reviews and thoughts about this movie.
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