Sunday 23 February 2014

Week 145 - The Orphanage (2007)


Reviews / Author Comments due: 02/03/2014
Position on TimeOut list: 76
More Info: Wikipedia, IMDB
DVD: Link

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Society - Lisa's Review


*** Contains Spoilers ***

As I finished this movie, I wondered how on earth I was supposed to review this.  Half an hour later as I type the beginnings of this review, I am still wondering.  So, here goes...

The movie starts getting to know our main character Bill, a privileged teenager living in Beverly Hills with his perfect parents and cute little sister Jenny.  He seems to be a decent enough lad, well liked and popular, but as we start the movie with Bill visiting his psychiatrist and having a rather weird hallucination, we know, not all is well.  Is this perhaps a clue that Bill is going to see some weird stuff as the movie progresses.

I have to admit that from very early on I was weirded out by Bills family.  There is such a thing as being a happy, loving family and being borderline incestuous and I felt we were almost crossing a line as the family got ready for Jennys coming party.  I actually had to google this.  I had no idea 'coming out parties' existed.  For anyone as culturally unaware as myself, this is where a young lady of high standing comes of age (usually 17 or 18) and is introduced to society.  Anyways, back to the movie.  While Jenny is getting ready for her party, there is a scene where Bill helps her with her dress.  It was here that I realised things were not as they seemed.  I think we're supposed to go with the idea that Bill is prone to hallucinate rather than think there is anything amiss with perfect Jenny and her picture perfect family.

We get some proof that Bills family are a bunch of wierdos when Jennys ex-boyfriend Blanchard keeps trying to get a cassette tape (yes, a cassette tape) to him.  He had his suspicions and had bugged Jenny.  This tape had an extremely odd recording on it with Jenny and her parents talking about her party and how she would 'do it' with someone her own age, followed by her parents and then the host.  It later progresses into rather lewd conversations with other women about what they all do together.  It sounds as like an orgy as you're likely to hear.

Sickened, Bill takes the recording to his psychiatrist, who later plays it back to him.  It is simply Jenny having fun at her party with all the lewd conversations removed.  When he tries to get another copy from Blanchard, he winds up dead before he can get the tape to Bill.  In fact, every time he tries to find out more, or reveal his growing suspicions to others, he comes up against a hurdle.

So, we sit through an hour or so of a banal American 80's style 'thriller' and then we cut to another style entirely, which is how I imagine the movie ended up on a horror list.  The following contains LOTS of spoilers so don't read if you don't want to know.

Earlier in the movie when Bill helped Jenny with her dress, I assumed that certain people (definately Jenny and her parents) were aliens.  The wierd skin thing also came up with a girl Bill got lucky with (Clarissa).   It turns out they are not actually aliens, but a different species to human who have lived alongside humans through the centuries.  Caeser and Genghis Khan are mentioned.

In the final reveal (which comes about half an hour before the films ends) we see Bill back at his house, which is full of high society friends of his family.  He is noosed with one of those loops on a pole used to catch aggressive dogs by his psychiatrist, who is also one of them... it's at the party we find out what 'they' are.  Blanchard is brought out and we see he is actually alive.  His death was staged earlier in the movie.  Everyone strips off to their underwear and the guests at the party start to eat Blanchard alive.  I say eat, but I should really say absorb. They refer to it as 'Shunting'.   I don't really know what to say to be honest.  His body becomes a gelatinous goo and everyone sucks parts out of him and puts fingers into him and through him.  At one point a hand is inserted where the sun don't shine and emerges from his head which is swiftly pulled apart.  While this sick orgy-like feeding is going on, all the participants have become pliable and gooey.  They all start to merge together, with peoples bodies turning into very odd shapes.

It is during this lengthy and very sick scene that Bill see's the woman who he thought was his mother who has a pair of mans arms instead of her legs.  We also see Jennys head pop from between her arms as if in some kind of vile adult birth.   If that wasn't gross enough, it's dad next.  His face is moulded onto an ass.  He utters the line "Who you calling Butthead now?".... My eyes are rolling out of my head by now.

I could probably give a lot more detail, but it's loads more of the same until Bill fights with one of the top gooeys - Ferguson.  Long story short, since Ferguson is all soft and pliable from the feeding frenzy on Blanchard, Bill inserts his arm into his stomach, pushes his way up to the head, his fingers out through the eyeball sockets and pulls Ferguson inside out.  He manages to beat a hasty retreat with a friend Milo, who is also human and the girl he slept with earlier Clarissa, who is actually one of 'them'.  Here the movie ends.

I suppose the effects were good for the time, but there was absolutely nothing horrific about it.  It definately has yuck factor, but it was all a bit skin crawly, embarrassing and silly for want of a better word.

Three quarters of the movie was dull, boring and too long.  The last quarter of the movie was just like something a teenage boy had dreamed up and handed to a producer.  I didn't see the point.  It was a mess as far as I was concerned.   I could see the last half hour ending up on one of those 'Tales from the Crypt' programs, but as a movie?  Seriously?  No.

I heartily advise to avoid.


Saturday 22 February 2014

Society - Will's Review

The Whitneys are a wealthy Beverly Hills family, their daughter, Jenny, fits right in, being part of the 'preppy' crowd. Their son Bill however, while popular, never feels that he fits in with his parents, or the circles they and his sister run with. He's often suspected that something was off, but when Jenny's ex-boyfriend plays him a recording supposedly of his sister's coming out party, he begins to learn just how different high society may be... And people helping him get close to the truth start dying.

Some time in the early 90's I bought a set of video tapes from a discount bookshop called "This is Horror: From the Archives of Stephen King's World of Horror". As best as I can tell they were cobbled together from a TV series which was made mainly to promote then recent (and in some cases, still in production) horror movies. One of the movies featured was Society, and I've been meaning to get around to seeing it ever since.

The thing is, there is a big shift in this movie 70 minutes into its 95 minute runtime, a shift in sub genre, I'll get into exactly what later (they'll be a spoiler warning, although the trailer does blow it to an extent), but all the footage on my old documentary VHS was from that final reel, and I was under the impression that this movie was wall-to-wall that genre.
Instead, for most of its runtime, it's a movie that would have bitterly disappointed my teenage self. The shift is an odd one, as I can imagine the twist being 'too much' for someone who went in blind, while being too late for someone who went in expecting it. In either case, I can see it being disappointing.

That said, a little older, I was able to appreciate the paranoid thriller that comprised the bulk of the movie, while my expectation prevented what followed from being a shock; whether this softening of the blow worked to the movies advantage is impossible to say; I'm hoping that Lisa has gone in blind, because I really want to know how well the shift works if you weren't expecting it.

Before I get to the last 20 minutes, I'd just like to mention that this movie is very much about how the rich are strange, bad, and not like us... I'm surprised this movie hasn't gained a new popularity in light of the 99% movement.

Definitely worth a look for fans of 80's movies.

MILD SPOILERS FROM HERE ON.

The genre switch it to body horror. It's hinted at a couple of times through the movie, with both Jenny and Bills love interest Clarissa being seen briefly to contort impossibly, but until the movie's final 20 minutes, these could have been Bill's imagination. My experience of the film wa, i think, somewhat changed by the cat that my "This is Horror" tape made the movie look like wall-to-wall deformed, melting and transmogrifying madness.

Ordinarily I wouldn't have mentioned it in a review, but a review would be incomplete without my mentioning the special makeup effects. They are superb, and serve as a reminder in this digital age at how much better physical effects can be for many things; I'd hate to see what the 'shunting' party would look like in CGI.

Monday 17 February 2014

Week 144 - Society (1989)




Reviews / Author Comments due: 22/02/2014
Position on TimeOut list: 75
More Info: Wikipedia, IMDB
DVD: Link

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Saturday 15 February 2014

Dead Ringers - Will's Review

Jeremy Irons stars as twin genius gynaecologists (female fertility specialists, to be exact) who share everything; including women. When younger, quieter, twin Beverly falls in love with their latest conquest, trouble brews between himself and the more confident Elliot, and they spiral into schizophrenia and drug dependency.

Once again I'm left wondering what this weeks movie is doing on a list of horror movies; for the first 80 minutes of its 115 minute runtime this is a straight up drama, and even after that point it barely makes it into thriller territory, and it certainly never crosses into horror. Indeed, for most of its runtime it came across as a (very well made) racy version of one of those TV movies that you see on 'movies 24' or 'true movies'. I mention true movies, as this film is loosely based on a true story.

So, unsuitability for a horror site aside, is the movie any good?

Well, it looks great, Cronenberg is a great director, and Irons is superb as the twins, like really good; you can tell witch twin is witch at all times just by his body language, facial expressions, and the way he holds himself. In fact, all of the performances are great.

Sadly, the film is entirely too long, about the time the thriller elements kicked in, I found my attention drifting; whether this is a matter of timing, or if those elements didn't quite gel I quite quite decide, I suspect a little of both.






Almost, but not quite, worth seeing for Iron's acting alone, there's little else to recommend, although nothing to really slate either. Ultimately, it's just a little too forgettable.

Friday 14 February 2014

Dead Ringers - Lisa's Review


I knew this week was going to be a weird one.  Its's David Cronenberg for gawds sake, so what else could I expect?  He's a director you probably either love or hate.  Oddly I would have said that apart from 'The Fly' I wasn't a fan at all.  That was until I had a look at his credits and realised he was responsible for 'A History of Violence', 'Existenz' and 'The Dead Zone'; all movies I do really like.  On the whole though, I find his movies too obscure and surreal.  I'm not saying for a moment I'm thick, but I don't want to have to have a psychology degree to work out what the hell is going on in a movie I watch.

This movie is one that has me divided.  At times, I think it's brilliant, but then other times, I find myself getting bored and restless.  I find myself wishing certain scenes hadn't been so long and other were longer.

To give a bit of information for anyone who hasn't seen the movie. Dead Ringers is based on a book called 'Twins', the real story of twin Gynecologists.  The movie was to be called Twins but ironically came out the same year as the Arnie/Danny De Vito offering, so it got second choice on the name stakes.  So back to some background.  The movie follows Elliott and Beverly Mantle, identical twins, who both happen to share the same profession.  Elliott is the much more confident, aggressive personality, while Beverly is the shy, deep thinker behind the scenes.  The men are very close and it is suggested several times throughout the movie that one would not exist or would not experience things without the other existing or experiencing the same things.  Sounds wierd right?  It is.

One thing which links the twins is the women they share.  The ever confident Elliott has his way with the lady first and when he has grown bored, Beverly is allowed to continue the romance with the women being none-the-wiser.  That is until someone gets in the way.  Beverly falls for one of the women - an actress, Claire.  She is the first to be aware that 2 men exist.  From this point on, the relationship with the twins is never the same.  The comfortable existence they had led before this is thrown into disarray.

Even though Claire is obviously not amused by the deception, she decides to give Beverly another chance and they continue their relationship.  It's when Claire leaves to work on a new movie, that Beverly starts a rapid descent to new depths.  He becomes addicted to prescription drugs, starts drinking heavilly and begins to have really weird dreams/hallucinations.  Most of these are regarding mutant women.  Beverly even has a friend fashion extremely odd gynecological equipment he can use on these 'mutant women'. These tools are typical Cronenberg and similar design can be seen in other movies, I'm thinking 'Existenz' and 'The Fly' for sure.  There are also some wierd surreal moments where the twins are joined together by a wierd fleshy substance on their abdomens.  This adds even more weight to the constant undertones of their need for each other to survive and 'experience' life.

Elliott tries to help his brother by getting him off the drugs, but he himself takes them to achieve the same state as his brother.  Although Beverly successfully achieves sobriety, his stronger brother Elliott now is the one with the problem and needs his weaker brothers help.

This all builds to the ending which I am not going to include, in case anyone reading has not watched this movie as yet.  It is probably the most powerful point of the movie for me though.

So would I recommend it?  I'm not sure.  Are the thought provoking parts worth sitting through the entire movie for?  I suppose if you have a lot of spare time and don't mind spending a couple of hours watching a movie you may or may not enjoy, then go for it!  I won't recommend it, as I was dying to press fast forward several times whilst watching it, but it's one of those movies, where you know if you do, you'll be completely lost (well, more lost than you are anyway) when you press play again.

People with lots of downtime, go for it.



Sunday 9 February 2014

Week 143 - Dead Ringers (1988)



Reviews / Author Comments due: 15/02/2014
Position on TimeOut list: 79
More Info: WikipediaIMDB
DVD: Link

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Saturday 8 February 2014

Hellraiser - Will's review

What can I say about Hellraiser?

You've almost certainly already seen it; Pinhead is almost up there with Leatherface, Freddy, Jason, and Michael Myers when it comes to horror icons, and quite right too; The Coenobites are marvellous creations, and their limited use here is expertly done, keeping them away from the spotlight heightens their otherworldly quality, and keeps the story centred on people and situations (ie. story) rather than being a showcase for the demons' (or angels', if you prefer) cool factor.

For those who don't know, the story (adapted by Clive Barker from his own novella "The Hellbound Heart") is about Frank, a pleasure seeker who, finding that all earthy pleasures leave him cold, opened (by way of a mystical puzzle box) a gateway into another dimension; one where pleasure and pain are so heightened as to be indistinguishable from one another. When his brother, Larry, and sister-in-law / lover, Juila, movie into the brothers' childhood home, Frank manages to enlist Julia's help to return to our world... At the cost of blood sacrifices.

Watching the movie now, having sat through the Video Nasties list, I was surprised how similar parts of it were to Possession, to the extent that one has to believe that Barker (wearing his directors hat) was influenced by that movie; although it's fair to say that it is a case of 'influenced by' rather than 'stealing from' as Hellraiser is very much it's own beast.

There's a lot to love here; superb direction and acting, great gore and physical effect, and astounding creature design, makeup and set design. If I had to find fault it would be with the too clever for its own good ending, which (following the stories actual conclusion) pulls a little twist which, as far as I can remember, is abandoned in the sequels (of which there are currently eight).

As I mentioned, you've probably already seen this, but if you haven't, do.

Hellraiser - Lisa's Review


This week we're onto a movie that has been seen by pretty much every horror fan out there and some non-horror fans most probably, such is its fame.  Rather than a review which would prompt a viewer to try this one, this will probably be one of opinions rather than fact.

The story follows Frank, his brother Larry, Larrys wife Julia and his daughter Kirsty.  To start the story Frank buys an intriguing puzzle box.  By solving the box, he appears to have been killed and some sort of door has been opened to another realm.  We will visit this realm and its inhabitants several times throughout the movie.

Franks brother Larry and his wife decide to have a new start in Larry (and Franks) childhood home.  Julia has had an affair with Frank so the relationship is strained.  We see as the movie progresses, that Julia is obsessed with Frank and has lost her feelings for her husband.  She inadvertently discovers Frank in the attic in the house when Larry cuts his hand, bleeds on the floor and appears to restore Frank to something alive.  To return to his human state, he needs Julia to lure victims to him so he can extract their blood.  With each victim, he becomes more and more like the old Frank Julia loves.

This is the bare bones of how the story progresses.  There is obviously other things going on, but this should give you an idea of where we're at, or if you've seen the movie, should be enough of a refresher for you.


I remember watching this movie many years ago and being totally creeped out by some of the horrific things contained, especially the creatures (known as Cenobites) in another realm mentioned at the start of the review.  The realm is opened by the puzzlebox and is a place of pleasure and torture.  Sounds wierd, but it's true.  Here we are first introduced to the iconic 'Pinhead'.  I remember marvelling at him and the make-up it would have required.  These days, many years on, I am still impressed at the special effects and make-up in this movie.  It was ground breaking for it's time and asides from an 80's feel to the movie, it stands up as a great horror even today.

Asides from solid acting, great effects and lots of gore, there is something that makes this movie stand apart from other horrors of the time.  This is the first movie (and probably still is one of the very few) that actually did freak me out.  I watched a lot of horror growing up and I still do, so it's hard to disgust or frighten me.  The Cenobites in this movie though, did fry my brain!  They are all so utterly repulsive, I remember asking myself, what sort of warped brain even thought them up.  There were never anything remotely like them in other movies.  In monster movies, it's hard to do something that hasn't been seen before, but with Hellraiser, they definately managed to do this.

Also the realm in which the Cenobites live is mind boggling.  There is so much going on and so much to repel and disgust, yet intrigue, you miss half of what's going on as the brain simply can't take it all in.  It truely does feel like somewhere I most definately wouldn't like to find myself.

I have obviously only touched on the storyline, but as I said earlier, most people will have seen it and anyone who hasn't, doesn't need any more than I've written to decide whether or not it's for them.  I stick a big fat Recommended on this one with absolutely no hesitation.  Ground-breaking horror at it's best!

Sunday 2 February 2014

Saturday 1 February 2014

Day of the Dead - Will's Review.

It's a funny thing with Zombie movies... AMCs "The Walking Dead" takes a bit of flack for being mostly people arguing in a confined location, with only the occasional Zombie attack; but that's the exact format of most of the good zombie movies too, and never moreso than in Romero's "Dead" series. 

Which leave me with very little to say; the plot here is quite thin and really is mostly people arguing, in particular Army knuckleheads arguing with scientists in an underground bunker which has been converted into a zombie reasurch facility. 

It's the third of the 'Dead' movies (following 'Night of the living...' and 'Dawn of the...') so the Zombie apocalypse is now in full swing (the movies don't follow on as such; they're unconnected save for being set in the same universe) and survivors are working on a cure, or failing that a way to domesticate them. Much of the tension is born of the disagreement between the 'destroy them', 'cure them' and 'tame them' camps, with the army guys predictably in the first camp, and as I've said, the tension between these groups has far more to do with the plot that the actual zombies. 

The general in charge of the bunker in particular is a real piece of work, willing to have the main protagonist for refusing to sit down during one of his meetings! I have a little bit of an issue with the carecter because he's almost cartoonishly nasty, but by the skin of his teeth he stays just the right side of the line. 

Speaking of the main protagonist, it's nice to see a femail lead who's a lead charecter first, and a woman second. By that I mean that she isn't there for t&a, nor is she there just to be a 'strong female charecter'... She's just a strong female charecter who happens not to have a penis - take note filmmakers; this is a strong female lead done right!

The real star of the show is 'Bub', the main zombie in the domestication project; by the simple act of showing him do some 'human' things (he tries to shave, uses a personall cassette player, and so fourth) Remero almost instantly turns him into a sympathetic carecter, and the asshole general is made all the more deplorable when he threatens the zombie. 

Props also go to Savini's special effects; though the gore is occasional, when it does come it is awesome!

So, as I say, the plot is thin, but the movie still manages to have that certain something that makes it very watchable. 

Day of the Dead - Lisa's Review

Back to some familiar territory for this weeks movie, Mr Romeros zombies!  As I have said previously, I have a terrible memory for movies I have watched.  Having a husband who is a biiiiiiig zombie fan, I have probably watched all Romeros zombie movies at least.  So what did I think?

This is (as with most Romeros offerings) definately one of the better zombie movies out there.  Having been made in 1985, the special effects are remarkable and pretty convincing.  It has a definate 80's feel to it, which does obviously date the movie, but I'm a sucker for that nostalgic 80's feel having grown up watching these kind of movies.  One thing which is a major plus for me is that the movie has a strong female lead.  Yup, seriously.  No need for boobs out or that mandatory shower scene.  No screaming and shouting leading to her and inevitably everyone in a close vicinity to hers demise.  That has to be a plus, right?

As for the premise, not particularly challenging nor thought provoking, but effective.

We pick up after the conclusion of Dawn of the Dead, although having watched this movie, or indeed its predecessor Night of the Living Dead is not important as the story does not follow on.   We follow Dr Sarah Bowman, 2 helicopter pilots (Bill & John) and Private Miguel Salazar as they join an underground army base full of survivors.  The base is also full of scientists who are trying to work on a way to either stop or reverse the zombification.  Amongst them is Dr Logan, known as Frankenstein who is working on a study where he is trying to 'train' zombies to do what he wants them to do, including being completely docile.  His prize student is 'Bub', a zombie who he has taught to perform several tasks, like pressing play on a tape recorder (it's the 80's) to continue listening to a favourite piece of music (Yup this zombie has a preference).  We also learn that Frankenstein has been feeding parts of dead humans to the zombies and has been performing various experiments on the dead soldiers.  This brings some serious ick factor and some great effects.

Another lead is Captain Henry Rhodes, a massive arsehole who is rather annoyed that everyone is not bowing down to him and killing everything in sight.  The movie follows relationships between the scientists, the soldiers and these main characters.  Intermingled is some decent attack, death and gore scenes which would satisfy any horror movie gore fan.  The storyline while not complicated or deep, works.  Who doesn't want to see a decapitation by way of sheer force, a man torn in half, an animated severed head, someone spilling their guts (literally).

I won't go into any more detail as not much more needs to be said, you'll either want to watch it, or you'll have already seen it.  I'm sticking a 'Recommended' on this one.  If you want to watch some zombie movies, go with Romero.  There's not much better.